1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
2. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
3. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
4. If you won't dress like the Victoria 's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.
5. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
6. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
3. Crying is blackmail.
7. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both.If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
8. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
9. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
10. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
11. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
12. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
13. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
14. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really .
15. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
16. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
17. Men are NOT mind readers.
18. You have too many shoes.
19. You have enough clothes.